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The Invisible Partners: How the Male and Female in Each of Us Affects Our Relationships, by John B. Sanford, Sanford
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An examination of the feminine and masculine qualities in every person.
- Sales Rank: #110247 in Books
- Brand: Brand: Paulist Press
- Published on: 1979-01-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x 6.00" w x .50" l, .53 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 144 pages
- Used Book in Good Condition
About the Author
John A. Sanford, a Jungian analyst and Episcopal priest, is the authorof The Kingdom Within, Invisible Partners, Healing and Wholeness, Dreams and Healing, Evil: The Shadow of Reality, What Men Are Like, and The Strange Trial of Mr Hyde. He lives I in San Diego, California.
Most helpful customer reviews
22 of 22 people found the following review helpful.
Revolution in small package
By L. Zechinato
As one reviewer mentioned, this book is short. It is dense in places, and required a second read of parts of chapter 2.
It's interesting how important turning points in life can be traced back to seemingly inconsequential encounters. I dated a girl just once, and we never saw each other again. While we were discussing self-help books that had been important to us, she mentioned The Invisible Partners. Later I ordered the book from Amazon and it proved to be revolutionary. Finally, I have answers. I understand why/how I'd experienced certain disorienting emotional phenomena since I was a young man. And now I have ways to "right myself". The answers and tools didn't come directly from the text, but indirectly from doing the work suggested in the appendix. (I think the appendix is worth the price of the book.)
If you're open to Jungian thought and have found therapy helpful but maybe unable to answer some key questions, do yourself a favor and read The Invisible Partners. You may not find it revolutionary, but I can't imagine you won't find it helpful.
3 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
good book, but too analytical
By Jesse
This book is good for introducing the concepts of anima and animus. But it lacks some good examples from real life. Instead it gets hung up on analytical details to the extent of being "anal." I recommend this book but it does not make it into my favorite collection.
69 of 70 people found the following review helpful.
Jungian Anima and Animus
By Neal J. Pollock
This book primarily addresses the Jungian concept of the contra-sexual in which men have a feminine archetype (called the anima) in their psyches, and women have a corresponding masculine archetype (called the animus) in their psyches. These unconscious forces have profound effects upon our lives, especially upon our relationships with persons of the opposite sex. This short book, while written some time ago, is still applicable today. It covers a lot of ground in a short space so it can be a bit difficult or even dense in places, especially if the reader is not intimate with Jungian psychology. Nevertheless, the concepts (or model, if you will) are valuable and useful in everyday life-not just with romantic relationships, but also with interpersonal communications and understanding.
In order to get the most out of this book, it is necessary to keep an open mind. This can be challenging; as stated on page 9: "Even the most elemental knowledge of oneself is something that most people resist with the greatest determination. Usually it is only when we are in a state of great pain or confusion, and only self-knowledge offers a way out, that we are willing to risk our cherished ideas of what we are like in a confrontation with the truth, and even then many people prefer to live a meaningless life rather than to go through the often disagreeable process of coming to know themselves."
Thus, recognition of animus/anima interplay can result in "being in love" which we resist analyzing and bringing into the everyday world. From pages 18-19: "Relationship founded exclusively on the being-in-love state can never last...being in love is a matter for the gods, not for human beings...it can endure only in a fantasy world where the relationship is not tested in the everyday stress of real life...To the extent that a relationship is founded on projection, the element of human love is lacking. To be in love with someone we do not know as a person, but are attracted to because they reflect back to us the image of the god or goddess in our soul, is in a sense, to be in love with oneself not with the other person...Real love begins only when one person comes to know another for who he or she really is as a human being, and begins to like and care for that human being."
Projection is not, however, a totally negative process because per page 20: "Each time projection occurs there is another opportunity for us to know our inner Invisible Partners, and that is a way of knowing our own souls." Thus, for example, on pages 53-4: "In learning to relate to a woman, a man also has to come to terms with the little boy in himself...We have no free choice unless we are psychologically conscious persons," and on page 55: "Of the choices every man and woman makes of his or her partner in life; in some way the partner represents something we need to understand about ourselves."
But it's not a bowl of roses either because per page. 83: "Projections can never be withdrawn completely, for they are out of our conscious control; nor can we ever become so conscious of the inner images of the anima and animus that projections do not occur. Withdrawing projections does not mean that they no longer occur, but that we understand them as images within ourselves when they do." But, (page 124) "We get well in direct proportion to the energy we put into our psychological development."
For additional reading on unconscious forces, see: George Weinberg "Invisible Masters: Compulsions and the Fear that Drives Them" Plume NY 1993 and Loren E. Pederson Dark Hearts-The Unconscious Forces that Shape Men's Lives Shambhala, Boston 1991
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